Porkin' Out (The Pork Store -- San Francisco, CA)
You wouldn't think a vegetarian would be willing to eat in a restaurant called The Pork Store, much less a place that uses one griddle for just about everything, but we have several vegetarian comrades who love the other vittles that are available there so much that they throw caution to the wind and say "Serve it up, bitches!" Oops, run on sentence alert. Sorry.
Anyway, the original Pork Store is located in the Haight in, well, a former Pork Store. Let me tell you, this is definitely the place you want to be the day after a bender. Their menu has everything to lube you up, flush you out and keep you satisfied.
Now recently, they added a location in the Mission, much closer to where we live, in the old Bitterroot space. But we still seem to go to the one in the Haight. The Mission location doesn't always have all the specials and it's right next to Ti Couz so if we hit that one up, I end up feeling like I want two breakfasts, which is OK if you are a hobbit, but not if you are a human.
In the Haight, expect a wait. Wow, that was a super lame rhyme. Anyway, the line can get pretty long, but the sweet folks inside will bring you coffee, and they're pretty good at keeping the line moving. CAUTION: In the Haight street location, there are a few tables and some counter space. You are not allowed to go with a group larger than four. That's my rule, not theirs. You'll thank me for it, trust me. If you don't heed this warning, you and your 18 closest buddies from college will be standing outside the restaurant for the better part of your Sunday.
Now that we have that all sorted out, let's get to the food.
The glorious, gluttonous, fatty bo batty food.
Jon is partial to the corned beef hash special with green onions and garlic and cheese and eggs and some other tasty things. When he feels like mixing it up, he goes to for the pork store special: two eggs, two pork chops, hash browns and biscuits or toast. The pork chops have a tasty spice rub, they'll cook your eggs however you like them and the pile of hash browns rivals Mt.Everest. And they are super great. Sometimes they're underseasoned/undercooked, which is disappointing, but 90% of the time they are crispy and salty and just one big pile of heart attack inducing goodness. I prefer my breakfast potatoes shredded (as opposed to cubed) so this is right up my alley. Jon always gets white toast. Always.
I usually get the same thing: two eggs, over medium. Some kind o' meat, usually bacon or chicken apple sausage. That fabulous pile of hash browns. And I usually go for the biscuits, which are are as light and fluffy as Britney Spears' brain cells. Sometimes I get an English muffin. But only when I really have a hankering for some nooks and crannies.
You want to hear something really gross? While we usually go for some sort of egg and meat filled love fest, we occasionally can't resist the lure of the oh-so-enticing pancakes. They always look so perfectly golden brown and springy. But we also can't give up our grease and salt, just for a little extra carbo lovin'. So we sometimes each order an egg dish and then split some pancakes. Oh yeah, baby, I can slut it up real good at the Pork Store.
"To eat is a necessity. To eat intelligently is an art."
-- La Rochefoucauld